I Feel Bad.

ASSALAMUALAIKUM W.B.T. . . .

i'm in exam week. baru settled 1 paper and i have four more papers to go. alhamdulillah utk first paper walaupun ada yg tak boleh buat. it's normal la kot utk org study last minute mcm aku. hmm after a day lepas first paper, aku g jumpa lecturer penyelia thesis aku. sgt MENDUKACITAKAN, my proposal REJECTED ! entahla, aku tgk org laen lek lek je buat proposal. approved je pun. she expect proposal yg terlalu detail, siap bandingkan dgn her phd students lg. mmg aku tak mampu la nk buat mcm tu. takpe, i'll try to do mcm yg dia nak. entah la, ingat cuti semester ni dapat la rileks siket kan. rileks otak, minda. mmg tak la kalu gini gayanya. dh la cuti dua minggu je. after that kena start praktikal kt sekolah pulak for another four months. nanti cuti ni, hubby struggle for his final exam (dia khonn student uitm lambat exam), while me will struggle for my proposal. haihh padan muka ko banyak rileks sgt tqah woi selama ni. but seriously i cried. entahla, memang rasa down. tak kuat. hmm. 

talking (?) about practicum, i am sooooo excited masa isi tempat utk mulakan latihan mengajar. sbb i chose my old school, sekolah menengah abdul rahman talib, kuantan. i studied there when i was 13 till i've got pmr result. tp sgt MENDUKACITAKAN, our ( aku and ana ) application REJECTED ! students from other courses semua approved. and then, we make a simple conclusion. sbb our course PENGAJIAN MALAYSIA ni punya pasal. pengetua selalu fikir kami ke sekolah utk ajar PENGAJIAN AM. and kami kan akan berpraktikum bulan 7. students form six dh nk exam utk penggal tiga time tu. actually cos ni multitask. boleh je nk ajar another subjects mcm sejarah (mampos aku), english (failed), mathematics (aku tak reti nk ajar) or sivik or geografi (aku tak minattttt). jadi aku ni mmg takleh nk ajar apa2 pn haha. tp normally senior ajar geografi and sivik la. pengajian am mmg jarang sgt nak2 dgn sistem pendidikan yg dh bertukar ni. tp please pray for me jgn aku ajar geografi. ya Allah, aku sendiri pn tak ingt peta malaysia weh. tak pernah score A even masa PMR ! taknakkk ! sivik okay hiksss. 

aku pilih pahang sbb dekat dgn kelantan. sbb klantan and tganu tak bukak. sng hubby nk pegi. tp kita ni merancang je kan. :/ hmm since sekolah tu dh reject kitorg, so kami tukar ke sekolah area perak. kt gopeng. sbb ramai cakap kt pahang dh full. stress taw tak, dh la minggu exam. baru je happy tgk carry marks sume dapat score sem ni alhamdulillah. but these things sgt mempengaruhi my attitude masa study. takleh fokus, jd bad mood. i feel bad. hubby cakap gopeng jauh dari kelantan. i really hope he can stay with me sbb masa tu dia tgh semester break. dh la puasa pertama kami after being husband and wife. tak sanggup nyaaa nk berjauhan ya Allah ! tunggu sekolah respon mcm mana. org laen dh sibuk cari geng rumah sewa, kitorg ni terlongo takleh buat apa. org laen dh tahu sape penyelia praktikum, kitorg mampu tunggu jeeee ! 

hmm esok second paper. i really hope i can perform well for pembangunan lestari paper. banyakkk sgt kena study. bila byk dugaan sgt datang, i will think "mungkin ini dugaan aku selepas jd isteri". dugaan berjauhan dgn suami. hmm takpe, i am strong and will always be. insya Allah. salam.